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January 19, 2005
More Realtor Terms
--Great neighborhood for children: Rude, noisy children who will trample your flowerbeds and steal your Christmas decorations.
--Immaculate home: Owed by anal-retentive type who will refuse to sell to you because your jeans aren't starched and pressed.
--Secluded: Accessible only by helicopter....and very long rope.
--Cute dollhouse: Perfect size if you're a doll....a very small doll.
--Cozy: Your family will be forced to sleep stacked like firewood.
--Motivated Sellers: Desperate to unload this decrepit moneypit on any unsuspecting buyer. Keep both hands firmly on your wallet while touring these home as they have been known to suck spare change right out of the pockets of passers-by.
--Window Treatments Do Not Convey: Be glad. Be very, very glad. See also, Statue in Yard Does Not Convey.
More when I find them.
Posted by Rita at January 19, 2005 10:32 AM