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October 23, 2006

And Another Thing

I freaking hate Lowe's. We were doing some home improvement projects over the weekend and needed several various & sundry items....one of which was a 4x4 sheet of plywood. Which of course won't fit in Mike's car unless it's cut to a more manageable size. We trek back to the cutting place and discover their cutting machine is Out of Order. There's no employees in sight to help us and we can't find anyone. But we had to have it so Mike eventually had to cut it with his trusty box knife to get it to fit into the car.

Minor annoyance yes, but it gets worse. We also need a battery-powered nail gun. These are apparently such a valuable commodity that they're kept locked up. So after searching 30 minutes to even find any on display, we then have to find an employee to get one for us. The only employee in the area is trying to re-assemble a door knob, and ignores us. Mike finally gets a passing 'Product Manager' to put down his cell phone long enough to get us a freaking nail gun. Meanwhile I entertain myself by watching Mr. I Can't Put a Door Knob Together....until I started wanting to take it away from him, spend 5 seconds putting it together, and shove the assembled door knob up his, well you get the picture.

We finally find everything on our list except wood stain. Which you would think would be in one of the paint aisles, but you'd be wrong. It's not even in the Painting Accessories aisle. By the wood and cabinetry? No. But there were 2 employees there productively discussing their weekend, so Mike asks one of them, telling him that we've looked everywhere and can't find wood stain.

The employee, who obviously thinks we're retarded, dismissively tells Mike that there's 'all kinds of wood stain' in the Paint section. Thanks, asshole, but ah, no, there's not.

We go back to the Paint section, Mike actually finds a live employee there and they set off to find the wood stain. I stay with our 2 cartsload of stuff. Mr. Asshole finds me. He's called someone, and tracked us down to tell us the stain is on Aisle 6.

Of course! How stupid of us! The wood stain is on Aisle 6, which is prominately marked "ELECTRICAL".

At this point, I want to find the store manager, point to our approximately $350 worth of stuff and explain to him in excruciating detail why we're not buying it because his store's customer service sux ass and the store itself appears to have been designed by a blindfolded autistic crackhead who was given a crayon and a big sheet of butcher paper and who also was apparently given items at random to place around the building.

But that would entail searching for hours to actually find the manager and it's faster to just go check out. Which is what we do after I find Mike trying to decide which stain to buy and I tell him I don't give a shit I just want to leave. Now.

Because I have had enough.

Which of course resulted in us getting the incorrect stain, and Mike had to go back later. We decided it's better if I stayed home.

I don't know if I'll ever go back.

Posted by Rita at October 23, 2006 07:40 AM

Comments

Oh, I can soooooo relate.

NOTE: I this had been the Lowe's around here, the previous sentence would have been repeated in Spanish over the public address system. LOUD.

Posted by: Jim - PRS at October 24, 2006 07:53 AM

I don't remember ever hearing that here, but pretty much all their signage is in English & Spanish.

All this was made worse by a couple of slack-jawed mouth breathers and their whole herd of ill-behaved children who apparently thought that if we stopped to look at a certain type of trim, it was infinitely cool and they had to see it too. They were so annoying I entertained the thought of grabbing a big dowel rod & seeing how many I could take out with my mad Ninja skillz.

Sure the old one in the wheelchair would've been easy, but them damn kids could move pretty fast.

Posted by: Rita [TypeKey Profile Page] at October 24, 2006 08:41 AM

My Step Dad used to work at the Lowe's in question (unless you went to the new one up Bella Vista way)

He quit.

Got tired of being the only one working. No lie. He was putting in 70 and 80 hour weeks. His Department Manager would walk up and say "I need you to do restock the inventory that just arrived before you leave tonight."

Then his boss would leave. For the night.

My friend Ron recently purchased some carpet thanks to the "Free Installation" gig they were advertising.

Heh. Free. It took them 3 weeks to install it. Thats not to say 3 weeks to arrive to do it. I mean they showed up 2 days after purchasing it and took 3 weeks to finish the job.

Add to it none of the install crew spoke English, and when Ron complained he got 1 English speaking person, who showed up at 9 am and left at noon, for exactly 1 day, and Ron never saw him again.

I go to Village Hardware in 'Vista now, after hearing all the nightmare stories. heh.

Posted by: BloodSpite at October 24, 2006 09:20 PM

Lowe's is notorious for their "invisible" employees. Lowe's is only good if you know what you want and know the store well enough to find it. If I want advice and help I go to Home Depot.

Posted by: Valerie at October 25, 2006 08:24 PM

BS, I can understand why he'd quit, he's definitely an exception to most employees there. Though I have to say I did find a couple in the Paint dept. last year who were very helpful.

We knew what we wanted Valerie, we just couldn't find it. Their store layout makes no logical sense to me at all. And we don't shop at Home Despot because of their apparent corporate policy of allowing illegals to use their parking lot as an employment agency. Lowe's may do the same, I dunno. If they do, I'll not go back there either.

The best place, if they carry what you're looking for, is Tractor Supply. I love shopping there. Logical flow to their product placement, and their employees have always been helpful & easy to find when I've been there.

Posted by: Rita [TypeKey Profile Page] at October 26, 2006 07:50 AM