Res Ipsa Loquitur

1.Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper for the little ones gifts just because it's fun to watch them rip the hell out of it. Everyone else gets bags. If they're lucky, they get gift bags.

2.Real tree or artificial? Since I developed an allergy to evergreens, it's been artificial. But the last couple of years, we've gotten a real tree because I discovered I'm not as allergic to firs. Hey, what's Christmas without red watering eyes, compulsive sneezing & a runny nose anyway?

3.When do you put up the tree? Real ones, a week before Christmas. Artificial, usually the first weekend in December.

4.When do you take the tree down? The day after Christmas, mostly because it looks so lonely without presents....not to mention by then I'm really sick of keeping the dropped needles vacuumed up. And they burn real good too.

5.Do you like eggnog? Whaddya trying to do, make me sick?

6.Favorite gift you received as a child? A microscope. Though after I saw all the things swimming around in a sample of our tap (spring) water, I decided not to look at that again.

7.Do you have a nativity scene? Nope, though I'm kicking myself for not buying a Little People one I saw recently. It was totally cute. Mike & I amuse ourselves by naming the figures we see in stores though. My favorite this year is Heartburn Joseph. Or "Asking for Directions" Mary on the donkey. "Jesus-Jesus, do we take a left here?"

8.Hardest person to buy for? Hands down, my mother. Or she used to be anyway. She never likes anything anyone gets her except for the presents from my daughter. So several years ago, I decided, since it didn't matter anyway, to just buy her things I liked. It's going to be stuck back in a closet anyway, and someday I'll be stuck cleaning out that closet so.....it may as well be full of things I like.

9.Easiest person to buy for? The grandkids. The best part is playing with all the toys before I wrap them.

10.Mail or email Christmas cards? This year I mailed them, but only because I needed something sturdy to enclose some photos in. I'm not much on Christmas cards.

11.Worst Christmas gift you ever received? OMG, thanks for bringing up that memory. One Christmas eve my 1st husband came home from work, handed me a brown paper sack and said "Merry Christmas! Here's your present!" Inside was a cheap generic Christmas flower arrangement that just screamed "last minute gift b/c I forgot to get you anything until someone reminded me late this afternoon". And before you give him some credit for at least getting me something, he knew perfectly well that I don't really care for dead flowers in a vase. I'd much rather have a living plant. So he also scores some major passive/aggressive points as well as thoughtlessness. Bastard. I came this close to beaning him in the head with them, but I didn't want to ruin my kids' Christmas by starting a big fight. I'm sure he was counting on that too. I often wonder why I married that jerk. Oh yeah. I was pregnant. Never mind.

12.Favorite Christmas movie? Rudolph. Or the Grinch. And The Christmas Story. And It's a Wonderful Life.

13.When do you start shopping? I usually start at least looking around October. Though there was one Christmas my husband at the time didn't get his Christmas bonus until Christmas Eve. Wow did that shopping trip suck ass.

14.Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? I don't think so, not that I remember anyway.

15.Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? My carrot cake.

16.Clear lights or colored on the tree? Either or both. This year it's colored.

17.Favorite Christmas song? Silver Bells. And Elvis' Blue Christmas, just because my dad always goes around singing it which cracks me up.

18.Travel at Christmas or stay home? I'd rather stay home, but that doesn't happen too often. The logistics of fitting in Christmas with our families & work schedules are mind-boggling.

19.Can you name all of Santa’s Reindeers? Of course. And I've been able to recite "Twas the Night Before Christmas" since I was 2. Christmas & Halloween are my 2 favorite holidays.

20.Angel on the tree top or a star? A star, a star, burning in the night. *snicker* Now you'll have that song stuck in your head all day.

21.Open the presents on Christmas Eve or morning? Morning.

22.Most annoying thing about this time of year? Rude people. But that's true every day.

23.Do you have Jebus in your heart this Christmas? I didn't know it was my turn to keep up with him. Sheesh. I think he's around here somewhere. *starts patting pockets and opening drawers*

24.What would you like for Christmas? All our kids & grandkids here on Christmas day. And after about 2 hrs. of that happiness, I'll be ready to throw them all out so I can walk through my own house without tripping over a kid or a dog. Just found out last night my son is getting part of his pre-deployment leave over the holidays, so we're spending today trying to find an affordable flight to get him & his family here by Christmas day. Wish us luck. We'll need it.